Aprilโs Theme: Release
In the tapestry of life, we encounter a myriad of relationships, each one unique and significant in its own way. While some relationships endure the test of time, forming lifelong bonds, others are destined to be temporary, lasting only for a season.
It can be both bittersweet and challenging to recognize that certain relationships are meant to be temporary. We may invest our hearts and souls into these connections, only to find that circumstances change and our paths diverge. However, embracing the impermanence of some relationships can bring about valuable lessons and growth.
Some of the following Tarot cards I associate with moving on from relationships:
The Hermit, Death, Tower, the World, 6 of Swords, and 8 of Cups. What Tarot cards do you associate with moving on from some relationships or situations that have entered a new season for you? What happens when there is resistance to staying in a relationship (platonic, professional, or romantic) or situation? When the above cards are in reverse, we can see how the resistance plays out. For example, the Death card in reverse is about a fear of letting go, which causes greater pain than if acceptance of the needed change happened sooner than later.
Here are a few reasons why some relationships are only for a season:
1. Different Life Stages: As we journey through life, our needs, goals, and priorities evolve. Sometimes, relationships that were once deeply fulfilling may no longer align with our current stage of life. This can lead to a natural drifting apart as individuals pursue different paths. When I first moved to the Dominican Republic, I quickly made friends with expats from my home country. But, after several months, it became clear some of my new friends were in different life stages than myself and I accepted the fact they were in my life for the season when I first moved to a new country and needed familiarity with the people around me. I also had less in common with my 9-5 friends than the new adventurous or entrepreneurial people I was meeting abroad.
2. Geographical Distance: Life circumstances, such as job relocations or family obligations, can create physical distance between friends or romantic partners. While technology can help bridge the gap, maintaining close relationships over long distances can be challenging and may eventually lead to separation. After moving to the DR, I began to lose contact with friends and relatives that were once a part of my everyday life. There was a bit of sadness about letting some relationships go, but I have no regrets about moving abroad.
3. Changing Values and Beliefs: Over time, our values, beliefs, and perspectives may shift, leading to a divergence in our fundamental compatibility with others. While it’s possible to navigate these changes together, sometimes it’s necessary to acknowledge that we’ve grown apart and move on. A good friend and colleague moved to Oklahoma and it felt like she was a world away from California. She now attended church, and rodeos, and began to adopt more conservative views than what she once held when she was in California. I began to distance myself because we had less in common and truthfully, Initially, I forced myself to keep up the friendship. Over time, I didnโt feel like bending too much to continue on in this relationship. I happen to have friends who enjoy church, but it was her changing beliefs that rubbed against mine that no longer fit for me and I had to be honest with myself about that. She, nor I did anything wrong – we just grew apart due to our changing values and beliefs.
4. Unresolved Conflicts: Some relationships are plagued by unresolved conflicts or a lack of effective communication. Despite efforts to address these issues, it may become apparent that the relationship is no longer conducive to personal growth and well-being. Letting go of such relationships can be a painful but necessary step. I have found some relationships need to be released to allow each participant a chance to grow. And, maybe from a more healed place, the relationship will have a chance to reconcile and be stronger than it was.
5. Life Lessons: Some relationships serve as temporary catalysts for personal growth and learning. They may come into our lives to teach us valuable lessons, help us develop certain skills, or provide us with the support we need during a specific phase of our journey. Once these lessons have been learned, the relationship may naturally come to an end. When I was a newly single mom, I formed bonds with other single working mommas. As our kids grew older, most of my friends from this group moved on. Yes, we check on each other from time to time on social media, but that season of our life has passed as most of our kids are grown.
It’s important to honor the temporary nature of some relationships while also cherishing the time spent together. Every connection, no matter how brief, leaves an imprint on our hearts and contributes to the richness of our lives.
Here are a few tips for navigating the end of a seasonal relationship:
๐ฎPractice Gratitude: Instead of dwelling on the loss, focus on the positive aspects of the relationship and the lessons learned. Express gratitude for the time shared and the impact the other person had on your life.
๐ฎAllow Yourself to Grieve: It’s natural to feel sadness, anger, or disappointment when a relationship ends. Allow yourself to grieve the loss and process your emotions healthily.
๐ฎMaintain Boundaries: If necessary, establish clear boundaries to protect your emotional well-being. This may involve limiting contact or avoiding situations where you might encounter the other person.
๐ฎSeek Support: Reach out to trusted friends, family members, or a therapist for support during this transition. Talking about your feelings can help you heal and move forward. Poised to Leap can offer support and empower you during your times of transition.
๐ฎFocus on Self-Care: Prioritize self-care activities that nurture your physical, emotional, and mental well-being. Engage in activities that bring you joy and fulfillment. I always encourage clients and Poised to Leap members to prioritize taking care of YOU, especially during times of transition in relationships or situations. Make a short list of your favorite go-to ways of self-care that you can give yourself with ease.
Remember, the ending of a seasonal relationship is not a failure but a natural part of life’s journey. Embrace the growth and transformation that comes with these experiences, and trust that the future holds new and meaningful connections.
Are you in a transitional phase in your life and need support and reassurance to help you on your journey? Consider joining Poised to Leap for one-on-one and group coaching.